Adoption week 12

In about a fortnights time it will be six months since we were approved to adopt, six whole months that feel like six years, why does time go so slowly when you are waiting for something important to happen?

Spring signifies birth, new beginnings and hope, so maybe this is a good sign for us that our time is nearly here.

Since my last diary, there have been no significant changes, still here... still waiting.

So I thought instead that I would take the opportunity to 'off load' to you about some of the annoying expressions that people use when talking about adoption.

If I had a pound for every time people referred to biological children as their 'own' and birth parents as 'real' parents, I would be a very rich lady. I am constantly hearing about people who adopted because they couldn't have their 'own' children. And why do so many people tell me about their friend of a friend of a friend who adopted and then had their 'own' child? People assume that I want to have a biological child, that to find myself pregnant now would be the icing on the cake for me. They couldn't be more wrong; having gone through fertility treatment and moved on, I am wholeheartedly, totally, completely and utterly happy, contented and excited about having my very 'own' children to whom I will be a very 'real' mum. My adopted children are my first and only choice now.

I feel better for that!

My other big 'bugbear' is those well-intentioned people who tell me how lucky our children will be to have Harry and I as parents. It's the sweetest thing to say and I know how kind it is of them to say it, but I can't agree that a child who has been unfortunate enough to have to leave their birth parents, can be perceived as lucky. Every child has a right to parents surely? They have a right to be loved and cherished, safe and secure. Harry and I will be the lucky ones, after so many years of waiting and longing, we will finally be a family.

I should add here that Harry and I will be so grateful to the birth parents of our little one/s when they arrive, although I hope to be their real mum that doesn't take away from the fact that they will have another mum (and dad of course). And I want them to understand that and feel comfortable talking about it, and one day (if they choose to) I will help them every step of the way to find their other mum and dad.

Well, that's all from me for this week. Except to say 'Happy Easter' and don't eat too much chocolate!!!!

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