Week 21 diary

Well, I've just had my first ever birthday as a mummy, and I have to say that it was probably the best one ever! Jamie was so excited it was my birthday - for at least a week before, he kept singing Happy Birthday to me and I had to pretend to blow out candles on an imaginary cake!

We had decided to go away for a long weekend in a hotel and had a fabulous time. We had quite a long journey in the car, but Jamie slept a little and was all refreshed by the time we got there.

His face when he saw that he had a whole double size sofa bed all to himself was a picture. We've not had a problem with him ever trying to creep into our bed (yet!), but there was no chance of him wanting to after he saw where he'd be sleeping!

On checking in we also discovered that there was no bath, just a shower. Jamie had never had a shower before, but this proved to be no problem whatsoever - he loved it and in fact once he was in, the only problem we had was getting him back out of the thing. He'd either sit down in it and just let the water wash all over him, or walk up and down in it splashing around.

Over the weekend, we spent time on the beach and paddling in the sea and just did all the things that both Tim and I used to do when we were little. It bought back great memories and when we look at the video we took, it reminds me of the old cine film my Mum and Dad took when I was little.

On my birthday I had my cards and presents to open in bed. Jamie had bought me some perfume - how on earth he knew my favourite one I'll never know! I think that will be a secret between him and Tim! We had a lovely day out and in the evening went for a meal in the hotel restaurant and Jamie was very well behaved indeed.

It was a wonderful and very special birthday, and I must admit to feeling very blessed indeed. All in all we had a super time and a lovely weekend we would never forget.

Of course, being three years old, Jamie's tantrums continue although I must admit with less frequency now. He's now starting to become prone to throwing and spitting. Throwing I think is just one of those things kids do, but I just can't stand spitting and he really does do it properly too. I blame footballers myself!

With the passing weeks, he's obviously started to relax into things so we keep having to remind him of his boundaries. Sometimes it can be really exasperating, but no one said it would be easy! I often have to remind myself that we've had Jamie with us for a matter of weeks, and we had him when he was walking and talking with a personality already well formed and not just a babe in arms!

Its not been a walk in the park, and at times it is really very hard work, much harder than I had ever envisaged. That said, it is the most rewarding, fulfilling and worthwhile thing either of us has done and we could never go back - it's just not an option - he's with us for keeps now!

Talking of him being with us for keeps, our social worker Susan visited last week. Next week the social worker's report will be submitted to the courts, so we should get a court date soon after that, which will be exciting. I went past the court last week and it looked like they had some big important case on as there were armed police outside! I thought to myself how excited Jamie would be if that happened on the day we were there!

It was great to see Susan as I'd not seen her for some time due to her holiday commitments. I was longing to have a good old chat and tell her how things were going, but with Jamie there, demanding constant attention, it was quite difficult.

Still, we have a big review next week with Susan, his social worker and someone else who will chair the meeting, so we'll have chance then. Susan was great and said she could see how well he was doing. She said she thought he was quite a handful, and I agreed. He can be, but on the whole we're all starting to get used to living with each other. We sometimes sit down at night and think whether this might be the calm before the storm or something, but we're keeping our fingers crossed that it's not!

We've recently tried to encourage Jamie to do his "number twos" in the toilet or in a potty.

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