News@www.adoption-net.co.uk
This story published July 24, 2001

New life for Chinese baby

When Felicity and Paul Tutton saw a television documentary about the state of some orphanages in China, they decided to adopt a baby girl.

Their dream has now become a reality. Richard Best went to visit the couple - and their new daughter Emily. A couple's dream of adopting a little girl from China has finally come true - after a two-year campaign. Paul and Felicity Tutton are now settling into life with 11-month-old Emily, the latest addition to the Devon family. She is a sister for the couple's two sons, Christopher and Dominic, and her home-coming was the culmination of a two-year battle by the couple who wanted to adopt a baby from China.

They were originally moved to try the overseas adoption procedure after seeing a television documentary called The Dying Rooms. It highlighted the appalling conditions which exist in some Chinese orphanages. After deciding they would like to adopt, the couple then had to undergo a rigorous vetting and selection procedure by social services staff to ensure that they were suitable.

There then followed months of paperwork flying back and forth between the Chinese and UK authorities as the wheels or bureaucracy seemed to take ages to turn. But all their efforts paid off when, in February, they received details of a little girl - Dang Fu Yi - who would soon be theirs.

"The details were all in Chinese and we had to get help in translating them," said Felicity. "That told us about her and there was a passport photograph. "Then we had to send our acceptance form back to the Department of Health in this country."

That was not the end of the paperwork battle for the determined couple who live at Copplestone near Crediton. Because they were not going to China as tourists to collect their new child, the Tuttons had to wait to receive permission to travel before they could even apply for their visas to enter China.

"We couldn't go until the end of May, partly because a friend who was coming with us had commitments, but also because Christopher had his SATs tests at school," said Felicity. "To begin with we were impatient and just wanted to go and get her, but to be honest we were so busy and we had so much to do to get ready that the time passed pretty quickly."

Finally, on May 20, Paul, Felicity, their two sons and their friend, Wendy Densham, flew to the Chinese capital Beijing which is to host the 2008 Olympics.

"We spent the first day there to get over the jet-lag because we couldn't face flying on straight away. Then we flew to Chengdu, the capital of Szechuan Province." There they were escorted around by their guide, Chris Tao Ping, who was himself brought up in an orphanage along with his sisters. "He told us that the baby would be with us within an hour or so of us arriving at our hotel," said Felicity. "We went up to our rooms and then Chris came to say that she had arrived, and would we like to go into his room. "The boys went in first, and our Chris came out again to say that he had seen her - and I panicked then and wondered what she would be like."

For the previous four weeks, Emily had been with a foster-mother following an outbreak of pneumonia at the orphanage which had killed another baby. And then they finally caught their first glimpse of Emily. "Emily took one look at us and burst into tears," said Felicity. "And then we had about one hour to ask them any questions, like finding out what kind of milk she was on. "Then we had to try to get her to come with us." But this was easier than it sounds. Emily had taken to Paul almost straight away, but she was not happy with the rest of the party.

Paul said the Chinese people told him she was comfortable with him because, out of the other British people in the room, he was the least facially different to the Chinese she had known for all of her short life. "She took to Paul and we gave her a bottle and then they had to leave, as they had to go back to the orphanage which was a seven-hour journey away," continued Felicity. "Chris got Wendy to have the boys and he then took us off to get photographs of us and Emily for her passport and the records. "That night she settled quite well with Paul. "It was understandable, because she must have felt absolutely bewildered."

That understanding began to turn to worry though when, after three days, Emily would still not go to Felicity. "She was going to Wendy then, but it was day four until she finally decided that she would come to me," said Felicity. The day after they had received Emily, they had to go to register everything and get the paperwork notarised.

"Again, we left the boys with Wendy and went off. There was no queuing as such; it was just one big building with lots of official things going on, and it was very hot," said Felicity. Among other things, they had to pay the adoption fee, around $3,000. This amount is agreed between the British and Chinese governments, and goes to the orphanage to try to make things better for the remaining children.

"It took us about three hours - and that was it. Then we were free to do the tourist things," said Felicity. They decided to pack as much as they could into their days there and took hundreds of photographs, which will help them to tell Emily about her home country as she grows up.

"It was interesting being there. Everybody was really friendly, and in Chengdu they were all fascinated to see our boys," she said.

"You only had to be somewhere for a few minutes and there'd be a crowd of three dozen gathered around to have a look." After nearly two weeks in China, the family flew back to the UK, brought Emily through the correct immigration channel - she was travelling on a Chinese passport - and then headed straight for home.

"Everything went very smoothly indeed, exactly as it was supposed to," said Paul. Now the couple have to re-adjust to having a baby in the house, although an 11-month-old baby weighing 24lb is a lot less work than a new-born.

"We're very lucky, she sleeps right through the night and eats anything, so both of us have found it a lot easier," said Felicity.

Emily is now learning her first few words in English, with the usual mumma and dadda. The Tuttons expect her language development to be perhaps a little slower than a baby who is brought up listening to English from the day it is born, although she will very soon catch up.

Said Paul: "Within a couple of days she learned her name. I'm sure that she understands quite a lot now. "And perhaps, in a few months, we will learn a few words of Mandarin and teach her those as well." Felicity said: "People who meet her can't get over how easily she adapts. "We will take her somewhere and put her down and she is quite happy. "We took her to meet her godparents after a couple of days. They couldn't believe how settled she was, but I think we've been lucky.

"We know a couple from Cambridge that adopted a little girl who wakes up four times a night and won't settle by day. It's just the luck of the draw like when you have your own." More than 90 per cent of orphans in China are girls and there is strong pressure on families to restrict their family to one child under the country's strict family planning laws. Couples prefer to have boys so they can help support their parents when they are older. Daughters become members of their husband's family when they marry. The number of orphans in China is impossible to estimate because many births are never registered. Only families in rural areas are permitted to have a second child, if their first baby is a girl. As well as meaning that the Tuttons were always almost certain to have a little girl, they also had to fill in forms stating whether they would be prepared to take a child with health problems or with special needs. Paul said: "We said that we would be happy to take a child with health problems, especially something that could be operated on in this country.

"Children with problems like a harelip or cleft palate are operated on in this country as a matter of course. "In China they just don't have the resources to do this. "I have a mole under my eye which is totally cosmetic, but something like that could be listed by the authorities there as a facial deformity."

Children, who have spent their first months in an overcrowded and underfunded orphanage, have often missed out on much of the attention that a child being brought up by parents would be normally given. They are frequently small for their age as they have not received the level of nourishment that they need for full, healthy development.

Also, their speech and co-ordination skills are often not as developed as would normally be expected. But that is only the downside. Felicity said: "Apparently they catch up quickly. They go through a growth spurt when they are being well-fed and tend to catch up quickly.

"Even older children who have learned to speak Chinese will learn to speak English within a matter of weeks. "It is almost as though they know they are being given a second chance and they grab it with both hands." The family have also girded themselves for what the future may hold. "We have to accept that we may have a child who, when she reaches 18, decides she wants to go back to Beijing," added Felicity. "What is more likely though is that she will want to go back on holiday and see the place she's come from and then come back to be with her family here."

That is a long way off and today the Tutton family - and that very much includes Emily - are just happy as they are.

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